Distance: Fonder or Farther?

May 30, 2020

Ah. One of the most talked about topics when it comes to relationships. Long distance. Can it really make the heart grow fonder? Or does the physical distance add emotional distance as well? Well the answer truly is that it can do BOTH. Especially during a time like this where social distancing has become the norm, people are farther apart then ever. We are trying to adjust the lack of physical connection and fill it with other forms of communication. It’s ironically given all of us a taste of what a long distant relationships entails whether you’re in one or not. For those of us who have had to social distance from our families, partners, or spouses due to Covid-19, it’s been an interesting and difficult time for all of us. Like many, I was curious to see if the longtime-said stereotypes about long distant relationships has stayed the same. I was actually happy to be proven wrong! Even in a pandemic!

Studies show that 58% of long distance relationships actually can succeed contrary to what most people believe, so don’t be so quick to judge just yet! LDR’s are more common now then they have ever been before simply because of the increase in online dating. Changes in the way people communicate with each other has slowly begun to diminish the stereotype that all long distance relationships are doomed to fail. Although it’s still tough and takes a lot of work, the outcome of a long distant relationship depends on and comes down to how much the two people involved actually want to be together.

Since majority of us stay in touch with our partners through our cellphones when we’re not with them physically anyway, what is missing? For most, physical connection is one of the most important parts of the relationship that is lacked. An absence of touching, kissing, and intimacy are among the core issues of why long distance relationships doom to fail.

A good way to supplement that feeling is through communication. Video-chatting, calling, and sending each other surprises in the mail are a few wonderful ways to let your partner know how much you love and care for them even when you’re not around to show them in person. Studies show that because of the longer distance, two people who want to show commitment to each other actually do a better job to communicate their days and keep in touch more. This will help feel less distant and even avoid the idea of temptation elsewhere. (If you ask me…”temptation” only means you’re moving on from your partner already, so if that’s the case, you might want to think over your current status).

Reader’s Digest’s Claire Norwalk explains:

“When our brains are repeatedly exposed to the same people and situations, they eventually become habituated, and we get used to these things as part of daily life. But when we encounter new stimuli, we respond with heightened senses, which is why new couples seem inseparable. In a long distance relationship, partners don’t become quickly habituated to each other, so the entire relationship can feel like a suspended “honeymoon phase.” Whether that’s a good or bad thing depends on the couple.”

Whatever you guys have agreed upon as your communication methods, the key is to make sure you’re aware of what your partner needs in order to feel connected to you on a daily basis. Whether that’s one phone call at the end of the day, or if you both don’t mind a continuous text thread going throughout. Be mindful of the needs of your significant other, and you’ll be sure to connect even deeper.

SENT WITH LOVE

A little way to spice up the romance when you’re not there is sending love in a package! Here’s a thought:

Only $38 on Etsy!
https://www.etsy.com/listing/674882108/stress-care-package-gift-box-self-care

*HOB TIP*

I usually LOVE getting and giving packages or baskets of a bunch of little and practical goodies as opposed to one big expensive gift. I like things that I can use often, and that when I use them, I can think of the person who gave it to me on multiple occasions, therefore I’m more grateful of the cause.

I love to build and send my own care packages for my boyfriend since he travels so much for work. I’m a big fan of them! If you don’t have much time to build one, send a ready-made one for your loved one like the one above! If you decide to customize your own, I suggest using some of your partners favorite little things! It shows you not only admire and care for them, but that you listen and know what they like. **I also suggest a hand-written note or letter to add a personal touch!**